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Full Online Book HomePoemsNothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Ordereth the Second Course
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Nothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Ordereth the Second Course Post by :Laurence_Baker Category :Poems Author :Horatio Alger Date :May 2012 Read :3149

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Nothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Ordereth the Second Course

Come, John, Jane, and Susan, the soup take away,
And bring in the turbot, the sheep's head and bass;
And have you got lobster and salad to-day?
And see that the celery's all right in the glass.

Now fish--Colonel Dinewell, which fish will you try?
And how shall I dress it to suit your nice taste?
For sauce to the fish is as love to the sigh,
Imperfect, it's worthless, and both prove a waste.

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Nothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Discourseth of Hygiene and Fish Sauce Nothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Discourseth of Hygiene and Fish Sauce

Nothing To Eat - Mrs. Merdle Discourseth of Hygiene and Fish Sauce
But this is concocted by rules so complete;Though piquant, is healthy and easy digested;And if you will note it as slowly we eat,The contents I'll give for our friends interested.Imprimus: in fish stock, an onion we stew,And anchovy essence two spoonfuls we add;With butter, horse-radish, and lemons a few;Mushrooms, too, in ketchup is not very bad;And pickle of walnuts with onions chopped fine,To which there is added some old sherry wine.My doctor, so queer, when I suffer distress,Inquires what I've latterly foolishly eaten,And swears that to swallow this 'horrible mess,'Would entitle a dog like a dog to be beaten.But la! such
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Now Colonel, to husband you need not be winking,While wiping the soup with a smile from your lips;I know just as well as he does how you're thinkingThe soup is as tasteless as though made of chips.You need not deny it, and swear that no betterConcocted was ever in London or Paris;Remember the praises you gave in your letterOf cooking and eating you wrote to Miss Harris.Now, Colonel, don't offer a word more to flatter--The soup may be so-so, but wait for the meat;And after you've seen the last dish, plate, or platter,You'll own then, I'm certain, we've nothing to eat--That
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