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Men Stuff Post by :SunisShining Category :Funny Stories Author :Unknown Date :April 2012 Read :2557

Click below to download : Men Stuff (Format : PDF)

Men Stuff

NICKNAMES
If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch,they will call eachother Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose.

If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out,they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat
Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

EATING OUT
When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and Johnwill each throw in $20, even though it's only for$32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, andnone will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn'twant.

BATHROOMS
A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush,shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel fromthe Holiday Inn.

The average number of items in the typical woman'sbathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identifymost of these items.

ARGUMENTS
A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of anew argument.

FUTURE
A woman worries about the future until she gets ahusband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets awife.

SUCCESS
A successful man is one who makes more money than hiswife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but hedoesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change
and she does.

DRESSING UP
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water theplants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read abook, and get the mail.

A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

Women somehow deteriorate during the night

OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.She knows about dentist appointments and romances,best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopesand dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living inthe house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's nouse in two people remembering the same thing.

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