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Funny Sports (mis)quotes Post by :sweden Category :Funny Stories Author :Unknown Date :April 2012 Read :3985

Click below to download : Funny Sports (mis)quotes (Format : PDF)

Funny Sports (mis)quotes

"As Phil De Glanville said, each game is unique, and this one is no different to any other." (John Sleightholme, sports presenter BBC 1

"Bill Frindal has done a bit of mental arithmetic with a calculator." (John Arlott)

"Fred Davis, the doyen of snooker, now 67 years of age and too old to get
his leg over, prefers to use his left hand." (Ted Lowe)

"Ah! Isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge President is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew." (Harry Carpenter)

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." (Winston Bennett

"Henry Horton's got a funny stance. It looks as if he's sh*tting on a shooting stick." (Brian Johnstone)

"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father." (Greg Norman)

"The Port Elizabeth ground is more of a circle than an oval. It's long and square." (Trevor Bailey)

"Watch the time - it gives you an indication of how fast they are running." (Ron Pickering)

"A brain scan revealed that Andrew Caddick is not suffering from stress fracture of the shin" (Jo Sheldon)

"The French are not normally a Nordic Skiing Nation." (Ron Pickering)

"That's inches away from being millimeter perfect" (Ted Lowe)

"I can't tell who's leading. It's either Oxford or Cambridge" (Jon Snagge, Boat Race)

"The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests absolutely round." (Tony Crozier)

"Here we are in the Holy Land of Israel, a Mecca for tourists." (David Vine)

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer." (David Acfield)

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Fake Steve Wright Quotes Fake Steve Wright Quotes

Fake Steve Wright Quotes
I went to a fancy French restaurant called Deja Vu. The headwaiter said, Don't I know you?I had amnesia once. Or twice.I heard that in relativity theory space and time are the same thing. Einstein discovered this when he kept showing up three miles late for his meetings.If you tell a joke in the forest, but nobody laughs, was it a joke?Even snakes are afraid of snakes.On the other hand... You have different fingers.If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? After they make styrofoam, what do they ship it in? It doesn't matter what temperature the room

Funny Horse Racing Quotes Funny Horse Racing Quotes

Funny Horse Racing Quotes
Grand National winning jockey Mick Fitzgerald: "Sex is an anti-climax after that!" Desmond Lynam (sports presenter): "Well, you gave the horse a wonderful ride, everyone saw that." (BBC) Willie Carson, riding his 180th winner of the season, spent the last two furlongs looking over one shoulder, then another between his legs, but there was nothing there to worry him." (Sporting Life) This is really a lovely horse, I once rode her mother. (Ted Walsh, Horse Racing Commentator) The US Postal Service honored legendary race horse champion Secretariat with his own postage stamp. That shows you how strange life is for racehorses.